Born Again

I have a NEW life now in Christ Jesus and with Him. Jesus is LORD of my life, in this new life. In fact it is precisely His Lordship that sustains my experience of this NEW, saved, glory I call my “born again” life. I am not alone and I will never go without help! In fact I literally have ALL the help I need, in Him, with Him and by His Holy Spirit graciously living in me and ALWAYS lovingly guiding me to think His thoughts together with Him.

In this new life I am a man worthy of respect and honor. In this new life I am a Rock of strength, stability and steadfastness just like Peter. The Lord Jesus Christ said to Peter “And he brought him to Jesus. And when Jesus beheld him, he said, Thou art Simon the son of Jona: thou shalt be called Cephas, which is by interpretation, A stone.” ‭‭John‬ ‭1:42‬ ‭KJV

There will come many moments of seemingly meaningless monotony with little if any value as you journey through the sea of moments on the surface of forms in this present world of space and time on which you now live in form. As King Solomon noted after searching out meaning through all the vast array of these forms “Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.” Ecclesiastes‬ ‭1:2‬ ‭KJV‬‬ or “all is meaningless” as it says in other translations. And in the realm of the shallowness of these forms, indeed yes, all is vanity, and all is meaningless ultimately.

Yet when the Lord Jesus came to us He also proclaimed, “The queen of the south shall rise up in the judgment with this generation, and shall condemn it: for she came from the uttermost parts of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon; and, behold, a greater than Solomon is here.” Matthew‬ ‭12:42‬ ‭KJV‬‬

The testimony of Solomon exposed the vanity of forms, yet the testimony of the Lord Jesus Christ, our Lord, my Lord, was that there is a meaning, a valuable treasure that is not vanity, a pearl of great price, that when the wise man discovered it, he sold all he had to buy that field that had it buried in it.

This treasure of all treasures, this truly meaningful and profoundly valuable treasure was, is and is to come the grace gift of God to mankind which is a mystical union with, in and as one with the Lord Jesus Christ like husband and wife. In this profound and mysterious treasure, all the fullness of all the grace in all of that which we call and refer to as “the Gospel” is fully and completely contained! Herein lies all the fullness of all the riches and glory and grace of all the kindness, love, beauty and power of God for us. It is the treasure of being One with our Lord Jesus… my Lord.

“And why call ye me, Lord, Lord, and do not the things which I say?” ‭‭Luke‬ ‭6:46‬ ‭KJV‬‬

In living the “born again” life, in newness of life with Jesus as our “Lord” we walk a narrow way. “Even the demons believe, and shudder.” (James 2:19) Yet we have a life in the Lord Jesus Christ that is called out to obey Him as Lord. This obedience is the mark of our true identity in union with Him as a humble bride following the leadership of her bridegroom. “Narrow is the road that leads to life and only a few find it but broad is the road that leads to destruction”, Jesus said. He also told a parable of virgins called to tend the oil in their lamps so that when the bridegroom returned, they would be ready.

Though we indeed have many meaningless moments of forms there is a deeper essence that lies under the surface of all that is which is a profound and intimate union in oneness with the Love that created the whole world and all the cosmos including every life within it in the physical and heavenly (spiritual) realms. This Love came to the world of forms as a Man in time and space whose name was and is and is to come, the Lord Jesus Christ. In and through Him we discover the liberty of His grace to be called sons of God as we believe in Him by His empowering belief in us.

“Him who the Son sets free (from sin, death, misery and Solomon’s ongoing prison of meaningless monotony) is free indeed!” “Come to me and drink!” “Out of me (and you) will flow great rivers of living water 💦!” That water will continually bless us individually and will also be a well for all the nations to come and drink of Him, (the Love that formed the world and even now still holds it all together in His hand), as we simply abide in Him like fruit abiding in the Vine. So it is with us who dwell in Him and bear fruit through obedience empowered by His unending Love and grace to us ultimately demonstrated, communicated and injected into all mankind once and for all at the cross.

Now then since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders us and the sin that so easily entangles and run the race with perseverance. (Heb. 12:1). We run as one who runs in order to get the prize (1 Cor. 9:24)… even though Christ has already won all for us. Yet as we run with whole hearted devotion like this to our Lord Jesus Christ we both express Him and experience Him in ecstasy and fullness bearing glorious luscious fruits of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

We become a living incarnation of Him, a river of living water bubbling up from within us for us to drink and for all the world to drink as we throw off the sin that so easily entangles, run the race marked out for us and abide in the vine of His love, the wine of His blood and daily bread of His body offered for us. As we consume Him we automatically obey Him, because we are in love.

How else could one smitten with such love as this behave when in communion with the true bridegroom of her heart, but to humbly submit to obey and walk with Him? In this kind love of our Lord and bridegroom, the One whom we are sealed with until that day of redemption for all things in the world of forms, even as we are already seated in that redemption in the deeper hidden essence in Him, we find a peace that surpasses all understanding not on account of anything we have done, but merely and simply because of the Love that He had for us and continually has had for us now also.

Luke 6:42 - 49 (KJV)

42 Either how canst thou say to thy brother, Brother, let me pull out the mote that is in thine eye, when thou thyself beholdest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, cast out first the beam out of thine own eye, and then shalt thou see clearly to pull out the mote that is in thy brother's eye.

A Tree and its Fruit (Matthew 7:15-23; Matthew 12:33-37)

43 For a good tree bringeth not forth corrupt fruit; neither doth a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. 44 For every tree is known by his own fruit. For of thorns men do not gather figs, nor of a bramble bush gather they grapes. 45 A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.

The House on the Rock (Matthew 7:24-27)

46 And why call ye me, Lord, Lord, and do not the things which I say? 47 Whosoever cometh to me, and heareth my sayings, and doeth them, I will shew you to whom he is like: 48 He is like a man which built an house, and digged deep, and laid the foundation on a rock: and when the flood arose, the stream beat vehemently upon that house, and could not shake it: for it was founded upon a rock. 49 But he that heareth, and doeth not, is like a man that without a foundation built an house upon the earth; against which the stream did beat vehemently, and immediately it fell; and the ruin of that house was great.

Grace and peace! ❤️ -Will

My Worth to God

I've often felt like I needed to accomplish something to be pleasing to God or at least have some past accomplishments under my belt. I've thought about things like... how many people have I evangelized, how many mission trips have I gone on, how often have I shared the gospel or treated the poor with love. Then I would proceed to judge myself based on those kinds of things. It reminds me of the story of Saul and David a little. Everyone thought Saul was obviously the kingly type and David was the most absurd choice for a king ever. But God thought differently, because God didn't look at men like other men did. God looked on the heart. In a moment of self judgment this morning, I started to consider what makes anyone of worth to God? Then I asked, what makes someone of worth to me? What makes my wife or my dog or my coming child of worth to me? Is it what people do for me that makes me love them? Well, to some degree I'd be lying if I said what people do for me doesn't please me... but when all is said and done it isn't their services that I treasure the most... it's them. Take my dog for example. He does nothing! He's really, absolutely useless as far as work goes. On a work day (when we are doing work around the house) sometimes I'll hear Lisa say, "too bad Jasper can't do anything". Sometimes I'll jokingly say something like, "Jasper, go get the address book for Lisa out of the office and bring it here... fetch!" When I say his name, his eyes brighten with attention and he looks at me ready and attentive. Then as my sentence grows more complicated his eyes just sort of glaze over and his head drops into a blank stare while he pants. I don't love Jasper because of his usefulness. This much is clear. In fact, mostly all he has are needs that I have to fulfill. But, I suspect it isn't really much different than this between me and God. One thing I love about Jasper's personality is that he loves unconditionally. He holds no grudges. The concept is totally foreign to him. I can chastise him angrily for something he didn't do that I wanted him to and even though he may cower when I am irate, the instant I am quiet again he is ready to come back over and lick me. He is the most loving animal I've known. In a way this is his heart. It defines him to me. Now honestly, if Jasper got rabies and turned mean I would be heart broken, but I think I would still love him. This is primarily because of the relationship I've already had with him in the past. Similarly, I can draw conclusions about worth from my relationship with my wife. I can see that my wife is of utmost importance to me not primarily because of what she does, though she does a great deal for me, but because of who she is... she is mine, and I am hers. We are one, joined by a vow and sealed with a bond of love until death do us part. She may make me angry at times or disappoint me and vice versa, but ultimately we love one another. Really, only by God's grace are we able to have this kind of unconditional lovingness. Because unconditional lovingness is who God is. It's what he is about. It doesn't mean he doesn't care what we do on the contrary he cares immensely! But, it does mean my worth to him is not defined by my ability to perform. After thinking and praying about this I looked over at a Bible this morning and had a longing feeling to open it and read the Words of life there. The Bible came open to Matthew 9:9 and I read through to verse 13. It's a section of scripture entitled, "The calling of Matthew".

As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector's booth. "Follow me," he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him.
While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew's house, many tax collectors and "sinners" came and ate with him and his disciples. When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, "Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and 'sinners'?"
On hearing this, Jesus said, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.' For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners."

I thanked the Lord for speaking to my heart on this issue. In faith I accepted this as a direct word from him to me on this. I realized again that God loves me very much and is continually with me listening to my rambling and sometimes wayward thoughts. He's ready and willing to give me an answer or reply if I'll only ask and genuinely look and listen for it.

Anchor for the Soul

Sometimes I begin to experience heartache as I think back on the past. I think this must be a common ailment as you get older. When you're young you don't realize that your life will not always be as it is then and the friends you know and the world you experience and interact with will not last. Knowing this when you are older helps you cherish what you have a bit more I suppose. Although, it can also cheapen what you have when you realize it will be gone before you know it anyway. I am thankful for my wife as I know she is committed to being a part of my world until I die. Although that is a comforting thought, even this is not as guaranteed as I would like. Time grips us all and twists and turns our worlds to ever changing and new environments. In some ways this can be exciting, but in some ways it can be very disconcerting. Relationships are important. They prevent loneliness and are comforting, but I believe they also fulfill a basic human need. I know I've heard that if a baby is left in a room alone for a long enough period without human attention it can die. I mean it can be fed and provided with everything it needs, besides human interaction, but that will not be enough. I suspect there is an intangible thing we describe as love that the child is missing in that environment. This intangible is more than a warm fuzzy, but a necessary component to nourish the human soul. I'm not really sure how hermits do it, but I can say for sure that I would be miserable as a hermit. Ironically though, sometimes I feel as though I am a hermit even in the midst of other people. I believe this is because there is no other human being that I can count on to always be there and always be with me providing me with companionship and love. Not even my wife can fill this bill. I remember a time when I was in college and I lived alone in an apartment. I went home for a summer break and had an incredible time hanging out with old friends and doing fun things with them. Then when I got back to my apartment the contrast of being social to living there alone in that apartment was intense. It took me a while to adjust, but then eventually I grew accustomed to the solitude and it became a lifestyle I was familiar with. In some ways it even became comfortable after a while, but not fulfilling. I'm convinced that good close relationships are a pre-requisite to having a fulfilled joyful life. I watched an episode of Lost on television once where the character named Desmond was mentally torn between two time periods. It was like he was constantly flipping back and forth between them and he eventually had trouble establishing what was real. The solution given to him was that he must find one individual who remained constant throughout both time periods and focus on that individual to serve as an anchor. He managed to reconnect with his past love and to stabilize mentally. I think there have been many points in my life where I have felt like Desmond in some ways. At times it seems as though my heart is torn between two or more time periods. I feel trapped longing for a past that is long gone and will never ever be my present reality again. This death of a sort is painful and I often find myself slipping into a state of grief over it. Realizing that my present reality is just as fleeting as my past one is depressing... But, "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday today and forever." My faith as a Christian is that there is only one who can truly serve as my anchor in life and that is Jesus Christ. The love I desparately need and the relationship I so deeply crave will only ever be constant and intense enough to meet my needs from Him. As the reality of this truth really sinks in, my desire to know Him and spend time with Him increases exponentially. But, unfortunately there is an enemy who devotes all his efforts toward distracting me from this truth... he is known as the father of lies. There is a verse that says "taste and see that the Lord is good". It is amazing to me that even when I do finally taste and see... and remember that which I already knew... before, that my desire for that goodness only lasts as long as I presently feel that goodness. The moment I no longer feel it, but simply know of it, the desire begins to fade. The farther in time I move from the experience the more my desire fades for it. Ironically this reminds me of addictions. Although generally with them the reverse is true... to a point. But eventually when you get far enough away in time from an addiction even it fades. Oh that Christ would be my never fading addiction! But, this is not how He works. He does not force us to be drawn to Him, yet when we truly embrace Him we cannot help but be drawn to Him. For he is the deepest fulfillment for our souls that they could ever crave. He is the anchor that prevents us from sailing aimlessly adrift in the ocean of time that we experience during our lives. He alone can love me as I long to be loved and care for me as every human being needs to be cared for. I am very thankful for my God and his patience with me through the storms of life. He is continually trying to teach me to trust Him and long for Him even when I don't feel Him. In this world of feelings and instant gratification, it is difficult to discipline our souls to chase after our needs rather than what instantly gratifies. Jesus said, "In this world you will have trouble, but take heart I have overcome the world."

Joy in Christ

The hole of emptiness in my heart is real and must be filled to have satisfaction.

I look into my past and see all the joys and pains I connected with then. When I say connected I mean part of myself was invested in people and events I shared with people then. It was part of a journey. There were times of fulfillment and times of emptiness. This is the way life seems to be many times.

When I look into the future I am tempted to tremble in fear about what will come, but yet I can also find great hope in the unknown. My present is the tip of reality. It is the "quickening" of perception. I long for peace and joy and fulfillment and intimacy.


"Come unto me all you who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest."

"For my body is real food and my blood real drink."

"Remain in me."

"For I am living water. He who drinks of me will never thirst. For it will be like a well of water overflowing."


Intimacy with my God comes only from one place and that is my heart. The affections of my heart must be for my God and I must worship Him in sincerity and in truth. In spirit and in truth I worship. For it is only by this kind of worship that I can truly be intimate with Him and know Him. This is when the filling of that empty hole in my heart occurs.

In the past I've considered logic and emotion as two halves of my psyche. I've heard it argued that maybe they are really the same or at the very least inseparable. Why would I even care to pursue logic without emotion driving me to care? Many times I've found logic an enemy of my soul. It has not been from founded logical arguments so much, but rather simply from the process of a cold analytical mind systematically dissecting my comprehension and my grounds for the source of joy and life I've found in Christ. C.S. Lewis says the quickest way to kill joy is to begin to analyze it. This is true. Joy cannot be experienced at the same time as the analytical mood of seeking or skepticism prevails. Joy is experienced through faith.

This thing we call emotion is really a manifestation of the state of our hearts. If we were completely and totally emotionless would we be alive? Perhaps it might be possible to exist, but not to live if you know what I mean. For life, true fulfilled life requires feeling. Even furthermore, it requires a sort of joy. For a life with no joy leads to destruction. Many times people who don't have joy or know where it is or if it will come, simply hold on and wait. I know I have found myself holding on and waiting before. Yet joy is right here in my very heart in the living water of Jesus Christ. Oh how I long to truly understand and know Him and be filled with the joy that is in Him. How I long to embody that joy and shine as a light on a hill. I want to share that light with those I love and humanity in general. For this is His desire for me too.

Our enemy strives to cut us off from this intoxicating joy that we have in Him. For if he succeeds in cutting us off or maybe only in suspending us from it for a time he renders us ineffective and devastated whether we comprehend it or not. When in this
state our hearts can only hold out for so long and eventually they will go in search of fulfillment. This fulfillment may not be sought in Christ and if it isn't then we will have latched on to sweet and tasty poison that kills slowly and satisfies only enough to make us come back to it for more. This is a picture of typical addiction. Ironically Jesus fills us completely and totally with true life and joy like nothing else, yet we cannot seem to find ourselves addicted to His love. But when we do experience Him through praise and worship and our eyes are opened, we realize what fools we were and are whenever we leave his presence.

"It is in the process of being worshipped that God communicates His presence to men." --C.S. Lewis, Reflections on the Psalms

I find it interesting to note when Jesus taught us to pray. In the Lord's Prayer it begins with praise and ends with praise. I believe everything we do should begin with praise and end with praise. Praise and worship bonds us to Him through faith and releases this joy I've been talking about... almost like a chemical reaction. It is almost a recipe for joy: worship of Christ in spirit and truth through faith. When we worship from our hearts, God visits our hearts. Now express this love in love to others. Show others love and joy from the joy and love He fills you with and you will practically burst into overflowing. When the well feels dry don't look elsewhere. Always discipline yourself to keep your gaze afixed on Him.

Be joyful always. Pray continually. 1 Thes. 5:17

Listening to Voices in the Heart

  Sometimes when thinking about spiritual things I find myself tempted with a small voice in the back of my head saying, "What if this is really the way things are?" as an alternate and unscriptural view of reality is suggested to my heart. For example a common suggestion like this that comes to my mind is that maybe although Christians have a view of reality that God is answering prayer this is just a perception and really things just happened to work out the way you prayed. Or if things didn't go according to how you prayed then you think of it as though God had other plans or maybe that you are just going through a time of testing where you have to just hang on and have faith. The nagging suggestion in my mind says maybe in reality things just didn't go like you hoped and God's will wasn't a factor, in fact maybe there is no God. This thought or voice when it comes to my mind is quickly dismissed and pushed away. In fact sometimes I find myself carefully avoiding a fully focused attention on these ideas. Why? Because they are so contrary to the Word of God and the core of my Christian faith. These ideas completely remove God from the picture and place chance as a new god in His place. I think it makes sense that my initial reaction as a Christian would be to push these ideas away as they try to press into my heart, however I began to realize that the best way to eliminate these is to stop running from them and turn and face them.

  First of all consider the complexity of the universe and of our human bodies and of DNA and the cell. You don't have to be a rocket scientist to rationally realize our single planet Earth teeming with amazingly complex life and no other planet even remotely like it as far as the eye or computer aided telescope can see is not something that could just occur by chance. When you begin to study on the topic of the chances for life to spontaneously exist it quickly becomes obvious that it is beyond absurd to believe that things just happened to fall into place for us. Maybe we could reason that the universe is infinitely large and that in an infinite playing field every possibility that could be is. (By the way most scientists would probably dismiss this idea, because if there were infinite amounts of matter the planetary bodies would not behave as they do. Stephen Hawking and other scientists seem to think our universe is likely in the shape of a giant horse's saddle. Even if we do allow for this, what was the initiator of time and reality? It is not logical to assume things just are and always will be.) Although we can already see that we are stretching our minds beyond common every day human reason to some grandiose philosophical idea for the purpose of what? Eliminating a creator from the picture? Why are we so anxious to dismiss the most obvious answer to this question? There is a creator God who made it all! The reason is because this is a religious answer and it comes with the potential for a whole slew of spiritual ideas and commitments. Some people just feel more comfortable thinking of the world as a Creator-less place. Keep in mind I am not trying to prove Christianity or any other religious idea here, but simply point out that it is a rational theory for one to hold. In fact it seems more rational to me than others.

  When it comes down to it, what anyone believes is a decision of faith. Faith is influenced by logical rational discernible factors, but ultimately what to believe is a decision by the believer. So, maybe when the suggestion or voice enters my mind indicating that the hand of God is really just a silly perceived reality that Christians make things out to be and the real reality is chance I can turn the tables with reason and faith now. By doing this I can understand that probably more likely is that much of the world has a percieved reality that the world is a place of chance, but the real reality is that there is a creator God who governs and listens and interacts with the creation.

Romans 1:20
  For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.


  Something I've been studying and learning about recently is the voice or communication of God to his people. After reading a book by Kevin Harney called Seismic Shifts in chapter six I saw where he talks about the common perception Christians have regarding their relationship, interaction and communication with God.
He points out that the majority of Christians pray and expect God hears them, but do not consider God as one that commonly or frequently speaks back to them. Something I found fascinating was when he pointed out that hearing God speak takes just as much faith as believing God hears you when you speak to him. "They are two sides of the same coin.", he said. He pointed out that many people perceive God's communication to them in different ways. Some hear God speak with their ears, others with their heart and still other by divine nudges. All of these require faith to be believed as communication from God to you. Why would the loving father God we read about in the Bible not speak to His children?

John 10:3-5
  The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger's voice.

  In fact I believe the nagging voice in the back of my mind that I feared to confront for a time and mentioned at the beginning of this entry is most likely the voice of my enemy that the Bible speaks of. It is the stranger's voice. Although, I did not perceive it as anything other than my own idea at first. Many times I think when the Lord speaks as well I consider it my own idea, when in reality it was Him all along who gave me the thought. A lot of times in cartoons you will see the little angel on one shoulder and the little devil on the other trying to whisper things in a cartoon character's ear and persuade him to do or think one thing or another. Although, we may associate this idea with cartoons and things that are whimsical which are not usually true, I believe there is truth in this picture. The Lord speaks to our hearts just as the stranger's voice may speak. But His sheep know His voice and follow Him. Believing that you hear the Lord's voice when He speaks is a matter of faith. Since I am speaking about the heart I am going to list my idea about what the heart is... Obviously your physical heart is an organ and nothing, but blood pumping happens there. But, I think the proverbial heart is much more than just my mind, brain or the place where thinking occurs. The heart is at the core of who you are physically. The proverbial heart is at the core of who you are as a whole person including spiritually, mentally and physically.

Definition of the "heart":
heart = place of: believed truths, thoughts, ways of thinking, desires and beliefs that I hold most dear, the core of who I am, what I passionately love or hate is dealt with and perceived here

It is in this core that notions or ideas to believe are proposed to me. Sometimes the ideas come from my own reasoning, sometimes from the Lord and still other times from a stranger. As children of God we must learn to listen to God's still small voice in our hearts or wherever it may reveal itself to our attentions. But perceiving a revelation as one from God always requires faith, just as believing I can pray to God and he will hear me does.

  I've also been reading a fascinating and exciting book by T.D. Jakes called "Overcoming the Enemy" that I recommend. T.D. Jakes carefully examines Ephesians 6 in this book and points out that in order to stand your ground against the enemy there are some basic core pieces of spiritual armor that you must wear to be prepared to face him. One of these basic pieces of armor is simple faith that God is who He says He is and is capable of what He says He is in the Word. As Christians we've already considered rationally and logically whether it is plausible or not to believe chance or some other thing as god or the Lord told of in the Bible as God and we've made our choice. Now is the time to mature and move forward and not continually revisit the very foundational things we stand on in faith. If we face the enemy in battle and we are busy studying our foundation instead of standing on it he will quickly knock us down for sure. Stop doubting and believe! You must if you want to stand and fight the tempter and enemy of our souls.

Knowing Jesus

What does it mean to know Jesus? You hear people say you need a personal relationship with the Lord Jesus. And "do you know him?" Many times people answer, "oh yeah I know him! I'm a Christian. Woo hoo praise God!", but don't have the slightest idea what it means. It's really a bit of a difficult concept especially for someone who doesn't "know him". But from what I can tell, like most everything, our ability to really know him is based in our faith. Knowing Jesus, at first starts with believing what the Bible says about him. It's about believing what the Bible says about who He is.. his character, his love for you, his power, his authority and all his attributes. And then most importantly, believing that he is with you right now this very moment... that he always was and always will be with you. Not looking at you from over a cloud off in the distance, but inhabiting you. Living in your very heart. And if he isn't in your heart, if you simply invite him to be there... he will come. When he comes he begins to convict you to change things. He wants you to do things His way. The Bible tells us (Luke 9:23) if anyone would come after me he must deny himself, take up his cross and follow me. By nature (flesh nature) we naturally desire to have OUR way in everything. When we don't get our way we believe we are miserable and in some form or fashion tend to express pouting. But as we learn to live with Jesus inhabiting our hearts we begin to have a new nature. This nature is referred to as the spirit nature. Our spiritual nature desires to have things God's way. Not because he is some oppressor over us forcing us to do things his way, but because we realize that his way is really better. As we learn to trust in who the Bible says he is and how wise and loving he is we also realize he has our best interests at heart. Much like how an earthly father usually is with their children. Knowing Jesus involves simply believing who he is according to what the Bible reveals and who he is according to what he reveals to you. This second part doesn't really come that much until you begin praying to him. The amount of prayer in your life is directly proportional to how well you really "know" Jesus. As you pray you form a concept in your mind of God and who he is, and what his character is. Then you try to relate to him with words. You try to communicate your thoughts and feelings and understanding of things to him. Why? Because this is what anyone does when they want to know someone else! They try to communciate to them with words. The next vital part of any relationship is for you to listen to the other person you are trying to know. Now if someone told me a statue could talk and I walked up to it and started talking to it... and then tried to listen to it, finally giving up saying, "oh well I guess it doesn't really talk." What was the problem? Most likely because deep down I really couldn't get past the fact that I believe it is impossible for statues to talk. Knowing Jesus involves believing that something is possible which the world will say is impossible. Until you truly believe that God can and does communicate to you specifically, you will never be able to hear him. So you say, "what if I don't know?" What if I just really am having a hard time believing this? It seems so ludicrous. God uses foolish things to shame and elude the worldly wise. (1 Cor. 1:27) The best thing to do first is simply pray about something. Don't necessarily ask for a new Porsche and wait to see if the car will appear on your driveway. But you could ask for a new Porsche and wait to see how God responds. If you continue praying about something over time and seeking an answer from the Lord as a person that gives replies to questions and requests, eventually you will see or hear or feel his response. He communicates in many different ways. Next... keep a prayer journal. As soon as you feel God has communicated to you about something in some way. Write it down. Write down in a journal prayers that you are praying now and leave space to fill in how you feel God has answered that prayer later. Over time your journal will serve as a testimony to you and build faith for you in Him. "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him". (Heb. 11:6) One thing I've learned over time is that when a Christian sins he or she tends to push away their belief in the fact that God is always with them and in their very heart and sees and knows things just as they do. Because when you truly believe that God is with you and watching you and is as close to you as you are to your own reflection when you stand face to face with your self gazing in the mirror. It becomes extremely difficult to sin. At least if you truly love him it does. And the more you know about him and come to know of him firsthand from experiences the more you begin to love him and realize how much he loves you. There are many things that people believe in without fully understanding how it is possible. People don't always understand aerodynamics and how a plane could really fly yet they get on them. I'm reminded of a scene from Planet of the Apes where one of the leader Apes is handed a paper airplane that the man had created claiming that it could fly. The ape looked at it and thought about it for a second and then proclaimed, 'that's ridiculous' and waded the paper airplane up in his hand into a paper wad and dropped it on the floor. There is a Bible verse that says, "Taste and see that the Lord is good". This verse encourages you to try it and then you will find your evidence that the Lord is good. The ape could never watch that paper plane fly until he first believed it was possible or at least might be possible. People don't completely understand automobiles, computers, VCRs DVD players and microwaves but they use them. Oh yeah we have a general understanding of what is happening, or at least what people say is happening but we don't neccesarily fully understand it. If we got really interested in how it worked we could ask someone we saw as an expert on it and then try to study books others have written on the subject. The same is true about trying to understand how one can know God. It's also possible to know God without really understanding how it's possible to know God. Just as you can push start on a microwave and watch it cook your food without understanding how. But if you thought the idea ridiculous you would never put your food in there and press start. Even if somone else did it and said, "look see!", without belief you would try to explain the effects some other way. Belief is a requirement to even entertain the idea. If I decided before I try to use a microwave that I wanted to understand it so I go to school and study it. Then I get frustrated because it is just more complicated than I have the ability to completely understand right now and I realize I need more school and more study. If I let my lack of ability to understand it become a prerequisite for using it then there would be many things like it that I would have to miss out on. There are things we believe because of faith in ourselves and things we believe because of faith in others. Ultimately even faith in ourselves plays a role in choosing to have faith in others. There is a famous phrase from Des Cartes "I think therefore I am". Although after giving this some thought I think a better statement would be "I believe therefore I am". Belief is the foundation of knowledge. So my point here is that understanding is not the foundation of knowledge, but belief is... and that it is possible to believe without understanding everything. Even the things we do understand about life and the world, we understand by faith in our own ability to perceive what is true and what is false. So if I tell you there is a great cosmic microwave that you can use if you just believe, you would probably laugh. But more accurately I might say there is a friend that you can know who's name is Jesus even though you cannot see him with your eyeballs, you can and will learn to see him with your heart over time IF you believe that you can. Why does this seem to sound really cheesy at some level kind of like Christmas stories that say Santa will come if you just believe in the spirit of Christmas? Or some silly children's gag. This is related to the fact that we are in a world at war and that there are spiritual forces who would love for you to believe that the idea of knowing Jesus is as silly as believing in Santa Claus or fairies. But unlike these mythical things we have first hand testimonies from people today as well as written words in the Bible from verifiably not really that long ago of people who have known and trusted Jesus. But ultimately whether or not you yourself can know Jesus is a matter of whether you are willing to choose to believe in the possiblity of knowing him. You may argue isn't it just a state of mind then? But, really, knowing anything is just a state of mind.
The definition of your mind's state is directly related to what you've chosen to believe as truth (aka "world view"). Do you really know your mother or wife or is it just a figment of your imagination. Are you just having some amazingly detailed and realistic hallucination? If you really began to believe that how would it affect how you began to relate to your wife or mother? Isn't it true that eventually over time you wouldn't have much of a "relationship" at all but rather you would quite likely try to ignore them. Why is this? Because deep down you don't really believe that what you see and experience with them is the truth. You don't believe it is real. In the same way you must truly believe Jesus is real to have relationship with him and know him. How do we decide who to trust? We decide based on how trustworthy they have been to us and continue to be. The same is true with Jesus. "It is impossible for God to lie." (Heb 6:18) The Bible and Christians communicate a message of hope to the world. They communicate a testimony of a man named Jesus whom all have an opportunity to know, if they are willing to believe.

"...we who have fled to take hold of the hope offered to us may be greatly encouraged. We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf." (Heb 6:18b-20a)


Matthew 11:27-28 (words of Jesus)
"All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

Spritual Discipline

There are times when we get really excited or at least expectant about things. Then when things don't go the way we expected or hoped we can get really put out. Its this point at which you are "put out", "hacked off" or "ticked" that the enemy has found fertile soil for sin. Especially when this frustration is selfish in that it is about not receiving some form of expected self-gratification. Disappointment is common and when mixed with focus on it can result in a powerful force toward sin. Our focus is like a fire and there are many fuels. You've heard the expression "food for thought". Any thing that can entertain our mind or be "food for thought" is a fuel for our focus. The reason I chose fire for the analogy here is that fire has this uncanny property of increasing instantly in proportion to the amount of available flammable materials nearby. It also follows after them unrelentingly. Sometimes I grow very frustrated about "rabbit-trails", although I tend to be a cheif offender in following them. This is a term that symbolizes the many possibilities or roads of thoughts and contemplations that can be followed during a discussion or personal meditation. Meditation is a vital skill for a Christian to learn and I have been struggling to understand it. It is about learning to let go of focus on some things while holding on to focus on others. It is about directing the fire of our thoughts to consume only certain fuels while determinedly avoiding others. The irony here is that if you focus on how you don't want to focus on something you are in fact focusing on the thing! Sometimes avoiding a "rabbit-trail" is not just about ignoring it, but intentionally following an entirely different one while truly letting go of the first. "Idle hands are the devil's workshop" the saying goes. If you only resist focus on something, but are idle in actively focusing on something else your efforts will not only be futile but in fact have the exact opposite effect than the one you desired. I've been reading a book by Richard Foster called "Celebration of Discipline". It is an excellent book. One analogy he uses in teaching about spiritual disciplines is that Christian life is like trying to walk down a narrow road with a steep drop off on either side. The drop off to the right is symbolic of putting forth great effort to try and do what's right. The problem is you will never be able to put forth enough effort to be righteous. This is what the Pharisees tried to do. The drop off to the left is symbolic of complacency or not putting forth any effort to be righteous due to a realization that any effort is futile. The narrow road down the middle is symbolic of a life-style of spiritual discipline practiced not for the purpose of being righteous, but rather for the purpose of creating the right conditions where God might choose to give you the grace of blessing you with his indwelling Spirit and grant you with fruits of the Spirit (peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, self-control, etc.). In his book Foster also refers to our hearts like a garden. In a garden you don't ever force a plant into growing by sheer effort or will power, but rather you tend to the environmental conditions of the garden in hopes that this will foster growth of a plant that will one day yield tasty fruits. It is the same with the heart and God's Spirit is the plant. Maintaining focus on the right things is vital to meditation and it is vital to creating the right environmental conditions for Spiritual growth. It is also vital to appropriately handling disappointment. The ability to handle disappointment is really the majority of what is involved in having faith. Although that is not all it is. The most important element of faith is that one believes and fixes their hope and focus on the thing hoped for continually trusting that it will come about despite disappointments which seem to test the faith. The problem is often times we set our faith on things that have no guarantees. If I go on vacation to Florida with visions of sunny beaches in my head and when I arrive a horrendous hurricane shows up my expectations are dashed. The faith I had placed in the joy I would find in Florida was unguaranteed. In my disappointment at not having the self-gratification of enjoying the dream I had in my mind of what things would be like it is quite common to seek after something else for gratification and find one's self in sin. The key here is to take gratification in something else, but the refuge must be taken in something that IS guaranteed. Only the promises of God are truly guaranteed. Intimacy with God through worship and faith placed in Him is the best way of coping with disappointment. (This is what David did after petitioning and being denied when God did not allow his son by Bathsheba to live.) Sexual intimacy of a husband and wife in marriage in the physical realm is analagous to intimacy found in worship between man and God in the spiritual realm. Although the physical example is but a dim reflection compared to the depth and intensity of the spiritual one with God through Christ. Christian meditation is not only about knowing how to hold on to good thoughts while rejecting bad ones or about tending to the spiritual garden of your heart, but it is also about listening to God and obeying Him when he speaks to you. This is something that must happen daily. Jesus said we must deny ourselves take up our crosses daily and follow him. This means we don't live life indulging in all kinds of self gratification, but rather we focus on the gratification that comes in following Him over time and deny ourselves the instant gratifications that the world tries to offer in exchange. When taking a shower this morning I began to think about how it is necessary to take physical showers frequently to clean the body. Sometimes I don't feel like taking a shower because I am lazy, but if I don't I will get filthier and filthier over time. If that happens a single shower may not be enough to clean myself back to the way I was before. The same is true for the spiritual realm. We need to take spiritual showers daily as well. If we don't spend time in meditiation on Him, striving to listen to Him and obey what he says to us each day then over time we get filthier and filthier in our callousedness and worldliness. At that point one day when we decide to try and spiritually shower to clean off it will not be enough to clean us and restore us to the way we might have been before. Only over time after adopting a lifestyle of cleaning oneself can the desired state of cleanliness be achieved. This is why we persevere and press on toward the goal to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of us. He took hold of us so that we might be the righteousness of God through Christ Jesus and have spiritual intimacy with the almighty God... So that our very hearts might be a temple and a place for the Holy of Holies. So, tend to the garden of your heart and seek to make it a place for the Holy of Holies by diligent bathing through meditation on Him and His word daily. Above all else guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life.